versusnurture | sixth ♢ public

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sixth ♢ public

[She doesn't hear from Arkin all day on Thursday; she doesn't see him, either. By evening, she's concerned. Maybe he's sick, like the new girl in the infirmary. She brings him soup.]

[When she finds him in his room, she drops nothing. Just places it on the nearest flat surface with a sigh and pinches the bridge of her nose.]

[The announcement comes after a slight delay, during which she's thinking hard.]

Arkin O'Brien has fallen into a coma in his room. I need help getting him to the infirmary.

[Anyone who tells her to let them take care of it and go away may get knifed.]

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I haven't been in control in a very long time. Every time I think I have some... [He shuffles around the file folder a little.] It's part of someone else's plot.

The last time I was in complete control was ten years ago when I shot Joe Carroll.

[She considers him in silence. Then:]

What did he tell you about me? When he was pretending to be my dad.

Not much. I didn't ask.

[He considers something else. This one is harder but he should say it.] Months ago when some of us got turned into kids... I was 16. [There's weight to his words there.] I saw my dad die.

He... said he had experience with troubled teenagers.

[She purses her lips, aggressively skeptical. Too many people have had "experience with troubled teenagers" and not been even slightly helpful to her.]

And you want to help kids too? Or what?

[She doesn't bother saying she's sorry for his loss. It would sound hollow.]

I can't help anybody. [said with a very strange conviction.]

I'm telling you... he knows what happened to the guy who killed my dad. [There's a weight to that statement. Ryan knows exactly what happened but you don't just undo covering up a murder for decades.] My warden knows and he knows.

[She's suddenly, perfectly certain that what happened to the guy who killed Ryan's dad was Ryan. Her eyes widen, and she tucks her hair behind her ear.]

And what will he do with it?

[Ryan shakes his head.]

That's something I hope you can answer for me.

[She unfocuses for a moment, looking at something not beyond Ryan but through him. Remembering. It's hard to translate what happened to her into what might happen to someone else. But she has an idea.]

He'll make it seem like it was your only option. Like it was strength. Like you did what you had to do to survive. And then he'll keep you alone with just him and your secret until it's something special you share just between the two of you. Until it makes you partners.

You should tell everyone. [A beat; she bites her lip, and amends:] I should have told anyone, anyway.

It wasn't my only option. I did it-- [because he wanted to.]

[Despite that he nods] But I see what you're saying. It's an effective method of control. A fabricated relationship.

Look, I can't promise he won't get to me but I can tell you I'm willing to do what it takes to keep him from doing it, from damaging the other people here.

[She nods, seeing the shape of it - not that she wasn't already pretty sure. And maybe there's a part of that that's hers too. Maybe she was forced. Maybe she wasn't. Maybe it was something in between.]

[Pursing her lips, she pauses, then nods. Yes. She believes him. Or she believes in his intentions, anyway. Will had good intentions too, and look where he ended up.]

But killing him won't stop him in the long run.

Are you going to tell everyone? Are you going to give away his weapon? Or are you too ashamed?

[This is not particularly accusatory. It's just that - if you're going to dance with the devil, you better be prepared to dance hard.]

Wasn't planning on killing him. [He's planning something crazier.]

And no, I'm not. Not publicly. It'll give him too much ammunition in the fallout.

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sixth ♢ public

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[spam] ten jillion years later SORRY ILU

[spam] np

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