versusnurture: (➵ just let)
Abigail Hobbs ([personal profile] versusnurture) wrote2014-05-21 11:07 pm

sixteen ♢ spam & voice

infirmary spam } after mirror barge

[Dying the second time . . . honestly, it wasn't as bad. This feels like a strange thing to think, but it's most of what she thinks in those days of the death toll that feel like death isn't quite over yet.]

[The difference is, her first death, her real one, was intimate. This was a mercy, sort of, and she doesn't totally regret it, but it wasn't. It wasn't.]

[The same.]

[It wasn't family.]

[She lies back in the infirmary bed and stares at the ceiling with a soft smile. It's very impersonal here, but that's a relief in its own way, too. She's not the only person who died, not by a long shot. She's not the person most choose to focus their attentions on.]

[She can just rest.]


spam } blight

[It's a few days after everything clicks back into shape that Abigail works up the energy needed for speech. She doesn't go back to her cabin, although she sort of wants to. There are pros and cons to everything, she thinks, and the pros of staying in the infirmary outweigh the cons by far.]

[Blight is here, for example. She can see him from across the room. His presence makes her feel safe, in a backwards way, simply because she knows he isn't what he was. He will not protect her, but he will be reeling as much as anyone else. Maybe more. He doesn't seem like a man who likes to lose control.]

[One more day, and she hoists herself up out of the bed and makes her way over to his. A soft, quick smile - an exhausted one.]


Who got you?

spam } hannibal

[She knows he isn't welcome in the infirmary. That's part of the reason she stayed. But halfway through her stay, she did begin to regret it. Because . . .]

[This death lacked intimacy. That's one reason. No one sang her songs. No one told her everything was going to be all right. No one apologized. There was no sense of closure.]

[And because he frightens her at the same time he comforts her. Because the uncertainty and insecurity of her relationship with Hannibal Lecter is secured with a love that doesn't seem to die.]

[When she is well enough to walk, she walks to his cabin, and she knocks on his door.]


inmate filter } minus hannibal

I know a lot of people who are here being - punished, or whatever - they've killed people.

How many of you hunted them?

private } ceres

I'm interested in your answer especially.
starofdarkness: (I really wanted that thing)

private;

[personal profile] starofdarkness 2014-05-24 02:57 pm (UTC)(link)
No.

Sometimes death is a mercy.
heavenlymisandrist: (That's a needless fight)

private;

[personal profile] heavenlymisandrist 2014-05-27 12:09 am (UTC)(link)
[ She's quiet for a moment, considering how to answer. ]

I have killed to defend myself, to defend my children, to destroy those who would ally themselves with my enemy. There is no honor in those deaths. But those who truly wish their lives to end, those I grant only mercy.
heavenlymisandrist: (It's a strange desire)

private;

[personal profile] heavenlymisandrist 2014-05-27 12:45 am (UTC)(link)
I know what it is to suffer at the hands of men.
starofdarkness: (you find out in the garden)

private;

[personal profile] starofdarkness 2014-05-27 12:51 am (UTC)(link)
I wished for an end to suffering. Death is often far simpler.
heavenlymisandrist: (That's a needless fight)

private;

[personal profile] heavenlymisandrist 2014-05-27 01:19 am (UTC)(link)
[ It's more like kindness, or wish fulfillment, but that's too hard to admit. ]

If that is what you wish to call it.
heavenlymisandrist: (When your blood runs dry)

private;

[personal profile] heavenlymisandrist 2014-05-27 01:38 am (UTC)(link)
Then you must decide for yourself what that means.