versusnurture: (➵ don't hide your mistakes)
Abigail Hobbs ([personal profile] versusnurture) wrote2014-11-14 10:01 pm

twenty-two ♢ spam & voice & spam

spam } dillon

[Like rising through the very top layer of the ocean, which is sunny and hard to distinguish from air until you reach air and realize what all you've been missing. It's so bright and beautiful even in the dull light of her room once she opens her eyes that it makes her smile at first. Before she remembers.]

[And then she thinks, in the grand scheme of things, in the grand scheme it wasn't so bad. She's been done seen worse things, it isn't so terrible, it's not, it isn't. She's okay. She's been okay. She will keep being okay.]

[She's thinking this as she sits up, as she begins to whimper, as she claws at the blanket around her throat as if it's trying to suffocate her. A scream begins to bubble up in her chest; try as she might to smother it, she can't quite. It keeps trying to be names, Ben Hannibal Will Daddy, and then in the end it's nothing, just wordless crying. She claps her hands over her ear and the open space. Hear no evil, she thinks, and help me, but she's forgotten how to move.]


public } text

I heard there was a memorial. And it's over.

Is it over?


public } spam

[She's in the greenhouse, looking for rosehips.]

[This is insane and she knows it. Not just unwise, but insane. The smell of them makes her sick ever since, ever since, and the song makes her crazy, but she hums it anyway, because the memorial is over and she knows she's the only one mourning him. So she touches the flowers and looks for rosehips and mourns in flat silence.]

[Later, the same silence carries her to the chapel, where she sits in the back. She wishes there were raised seats, a hidden place, but this is what there is so this is what she takes. It's probably an awful thing to do, to pray to something that never was a god and that she never believed in for someone who never understood, but she does that anyway, too. For Ben, not for Hannibal. Even she would never pray for Hannibal.]
semifreakingnormal: (and we all know what we've done)

} spam

[personal profile] semifreakingnormal 2014-11-15 05:00 am (UTC)(link)
[He smells her.

He's walking down from the deck, and he smells her. For a moment, he thinks his nose is confusing him, that it's in his head. But he inhales and he smells her shampoo, and he knows he's not making it up.

Scott takes it slow, opening the greenhouse door and easing in. When he spots her, he struggles not to just run up and hug her.]


Abigail?
semifreakingnormal: (when life leaves you high and dry)

[personal profile] semifreakingnormal 2014-11-16 02:48 am (UTC)(link)
[It takes him only a little bit by surprise. But then her arms are around him and he's hugging her tight, letting out a relieved breath over her shoulder. He doesn't shake, but he feels shaky. This time, it's in a good way.]

I'm so glad you're up.

[He's so glad she slept through most of the worst.]
semifreakingnormal: (to a congress of ravens)

[personal profile] semifreakingnormal 2014-11-16 03:00 am (UTC)(link)
[He squeezes a little tighter: nothing could make him let go right now.

He thinks about asking why, why she's not, but instead he swallows.]


He'll be back.
semifreakingnormal: (I'm gonna be there to catch you)

[personal profile] semifreakingnormal 2014-11-16 03:13 am (UTC)(link)
I--

[He wonders who else is gone, he thinks about Jack, he thinks about Erica, and his whole stomach just twists horribly, then drops away.]

I guess you're right. [He meant Ben. Of course he meant Ben, but it feels like salt in the wound.]

I'm not going anywhere. I promise.

[Sometimes it's not their choice, but Scott refuses to let that factor in. He won't leave her.]
semifreakingnormal: (where we got left to run?)

[personal profile] semifreakingnormal 2014-11-18 02:12 am (UTC)(link)
[He doesn't respond - he doesn't know what she's thanking him for, it wouldn't feel right to say you're welcome. He lets her hold him instead, resting his cheek against her hair.]

It's gonna be okay.
semifreakingnormal: (burned down their hanging trees)

[personal profile] semifreakingnormal 2014-11-18 02:40 am (UTC)(link)
It has to be.

[There's a not of - he thinks it might be despair, and tells himself it's uncertainty. So he squeezes her a little tighter, and on impulse, kisses the side of her head.]

It has to be.
semifreakingnormal: (rat a tat tat)

[personal profile] semifreakingnormal 2014-11-18 03:10 am (UTC)(link)
[He smiles a little, reaching up to run his hand through his hair once she's done.]

No. I mean, Stiles, he's practically my brother. But I was an only child.
semifreakingnormal: (you pull the pin and say:)

[personal profile] semifreakingnormal 2014-11-24 12:41 am (UTC)(link)
[His smile grows, but he leaves it. Gosh.]

I think you'd have been a good sister. [He just wishes she had a better family, or no father, or something. He'd have welcomed her into his family in a heartbeat.]
semifreakingnormal: (in your pose)

[personal profile] semifreakingnormal 2014-12-03 03:28 am (UTC)(link)
[He smiles, a little sadly because it's hard to look back and see what you were like. He doesn't know if she's right about herself, he only knows enough to be sure of who she is now. And he's very sure.]

You'd be a great sister, now. I bet I could stand sharing a bathroom with you.
semifreakingnormal: (won't you lay hands on me)

[personal profile] semifreakingnormal 2014-12-29 04:40 pm (UTC)(link)
[He laughs too. He can't not.]

That's okay I totally do.
Edited 2014-12-29 16:41 (UTC)